AOL Prank Calls: ---------------------------------------------------
Cybersex ------------------------------------------------------------------------
Call placed to 1-800-4-ONLINE, the number to order an AOL startup kit.
::::::::ring::::::::
AOL: America Online, this is Diane speaking.
Me: Hi, I have some questions about American Online before I join.
AOL: Okay sir what's your question?
Me: Well, some of my friends who have AOL say they get something called
"cybersex"... does this cost extra?
AOL: :::quiet laugh in the background::: Well sir...I don't know how to
explain this, but cybersex is not part of America Online.
Me: Oh really? My friends said they got it from AOL.
AOL: Well its something members typically do when they go to a chat
room.
Me: Humm...I don't understand, what is cybersex??
AOL: I'm sorry I really don't know how to explain it.
Me: Humm..well, have you ever had cybersex?
AOL: Sir I don't think that's an appropriate question to be asking me.
Is there anything else you need?
Me: Sorry, like I said I don't even know what it is.
AOL: That's okay sir, anything else?
Me: Yes, I have one more question.
AOL: Go ahead
Me: What are you wearing?
AOL: <click>
:::Weird how she said "its something members typically do when they go to a
chat room"...TYPICALLY? Well, we know what SHE does online ;):::
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New User Troubles.
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AOL: America Online, this is Debby, how may I help you this evening?
Me: Yes, I'm trying to become an AOL member, but I'm having problems
making my account.
AOL: Okay, what's happening?
Me: It disconnects me saying Invalid Credit Card.
AOL: What kind of credit card are you using?
Me: Visa.
AOL: Are you sure your card isn't expired?
Me: Actually, it's a stolen credit card.
AOL: Pardon, sir?
Me: Yeah, I stole it. I just jumped some guy and pounded him until he
gave me his card.
AOL: Umm, sir I'm sorry I can't help you.
Me: Aww, c'mon, I'll give you a cookie.
AOL: Sir I have to go. <click>
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E-Mail Confusion - AOL Prank Calls -------------------------------------------------------------------------
You must read all of this, this is the only prank call where I get to
harrass an AOL supervisor.
The comments in red were not said over the phone, they just give you
some more detail on the call.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Call placed to AOL call center, 1-800-4-ONLINE
AOL: America Online, This is Sarah, would you like to order America
Online software?
Sarah sounds like some hyperactive youngster.
Me: Well, I'm not sure yet, I have a few questions first.
AOL: Okay sir how can I help you?
Me: With AOL, I can send E Mail right?
AOL: Yes you can.
Me: Okay....now... Who the hell is "E" and why does everyone want to
mail him????
Now is when I hear some giggles... she puts me on hold to gather
herself.
AOL: Please Hold.
AOL: Okay, sir I'm back, sorry about that, we had a little problem
here.
Me: No problem.
AOL: Okay.... well sir, "E" means electronic.
Me: Now I'm even more confused.
AOL: Hum... how so?
Me: If "E" is electronic, how does it know what to write back?
Here she lets out a sigh.... stressing to find a way to explain email to
me.
AOL: Sir can you hold on again?
Me: Okay.
AOL: Hello, this is the supervisor here.... what exactly is your
question? Maybe I can answer that for you.
Me: Well.... who, or what, is "E"...and why does everyone want to mail
him?
AOL: E-Mail means electronic mail, its a way you can send writing to a
friend over the computer.
Me: Ohh... simple enough... I feel so stupid.
AOL: Haha, well... that's okay, you gotta learn somewhere.
Do you
have any other questions?
Me: Yes, I heard that AOL has a problem with something my friends call
'suckage'.
AOL: Hmmm...what exactly is that?
Me: Well, they say that AOL sucks, and that I shouldn't get it.
But
sometimes my friends are idiots, so I want to know, does AOL suck?
AOL: Oh no it does not. AOL has the fastest connection to the
internet, and over 9 million members!
Of course it does! What was I thinking??
Me: Not according to inside-aol ,aolwatch, pf@aol, aof, and many other
web sites.
AOL: Well, those kind of web sites have a lot of lies, why don't you
come try out AOL for yourself?
Me: Oh, so you've seen those sites?
AOL: Yes, they are all lies.
Me: How about those inside-aol prank calls?
AOL: Oh boy.... is this one of those?
It's a true honor to know moronic supervisors visit this site.... well,
okay, not really.
Me: Could be.
AOL: Well, I need you to disconnect immediately.
This man is sounding very scared... like I have a gun to his head over
the phone.
Me: What??
AOL: I need you to disconnect, we have other calls to take.
Me: haha... look down, there's this thing on your phone called a
'hook'...you can hang up on me!
This is when I hear a deep thinking "hmmm"....and he hangs up.
